Tag: stress

Is It Reliable?

Is It Reliable?

by Nikki Rich Writes ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

Even though I have a few years left, there’s no denying that my twenty something journey is coming to a close. With thirty on the horizon, my mind can’t help but think about who I’ll become as a thirty something. For many, thirty announces true adulthood. No longer struggling (as much) to figure things out, thirty somethings seem to have a greater handle on crises with much more wisdom and responsibility. I can’t forget about the stereotypical thirty something events either. Marriage, babies, owning homes, finding that stable job, and finally starting your life (as if it’s been on standby all this time). These are all wonderful and exciting things to anticipate. As I reflect on these upcoming events however, there’s something about them that seem a little sketchy. They look like a lot of pushing, pressure, expectation, and comparison. For me, to a degree, they raise a red flag. Is this the marker of success for me? Is this who I must become? What if I don’t achieve everything in time? What will that mean for me?

When I ask those questions, what I’m truly getting at is purpose. We’re told to build the family, climb the corporate ladder and secure wealth to pass down. We’re told to look for stability, to do better than our parents, and never settle for less. These are great things, honorable aspirations. What happens, however, when those things fail? What happens when that stable job lays you off? What happens when you’re 35 and aren’t married with kids yet? What happens when you do your very best and still don’t get promoted? Do you crash and burn and settle in defeat? Who even told you that you had to follow that specific path on that specific timeline anyway? If you veer off and take some back streets to the final destination, are you any less than? I hope you already know the right answer.

What frustrates me most is that these expectations don’t put God in the equation at all. We are told to hustle. To network. To date. To pursue. To fight. Did God tell us to do that though? Moreover, did God finish developing the character necessary for us to handle such things responsibly? It all feels like pressure to perform without the wisdom to discern. As the world makes these cultural rules for us to follow, have we ever considered how shaky the world and its ways are? Have we ever considered how shaky and unreliable even we can be? We believe something one day then prove it wrong by next week. We have mood swings and make hasty decisions that prove detrimental. How can we follow a guideline put forth by people and institutions that can barely hold themselves above water? What’s the solution?

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.” – Proverbs 3:5-6

One of the things I love about God is that He is all knowing. Even with the best education and life experiences, sometimes our plans and ventures fall flat. Our understanding is faulty. Our foresight is nearsighted. On our own, we can’t always be sure our decisions are their absolute best. When we take the pressure off of ourselves however, and let God lead us, we gain confidence. God is now on the line for the plans and steps He tells us to follow. We are assured that even if things seem to be going left, God is not a liar. If He promised that all things work together for the good of those who love Him (aka us), then good they will be. No unnecessary pressure. No worldly standards. No burden. God has it under control.

“Honor the LORD with your wealth, with the firstfruits of all your crops; then your barns will be filled to overflowing, and your vats will brim over with new wine.” – Proverbs 3:9–10

Put notice on the promise of overflow in this scripture. Have you realized that in order to fill to overflow, you must be the source of the abundance. Once again, it’s a promise from God that releases the pressure from us. You’re honoring God with the firstfruits because He was the one who supplied it in the first place. If He’s the ultimate provider then our only job is to work well and trust Him for the provision. His provision may be a job you weren’t qualified for or an extra check you weren’t expecting. His provision may be that job layoff, which protected you from scandal at the corporation, or even just enough to pay the bills another month. Whether it seems grand or simple, the source is solid. It’s reliable. It’s generous. It’s trustworthy. It’s God. Let the characteristics of God bring about the peace you need in this world of striving.

“Humble yourselves in the presence of the Lord, and He will exalt you.” – James 4:10

I realize that what I’m suggesting is a tall order for some. We aren’t necessarily wired to just trust God. We’ve been taught to do our best, be responsible, plan for the future, and strive to live our best lives. I’m not suggesting we stop having goals and aspirations. I’m only asking us to assess the source whenever we’re motivated to move in a certain direction or desire something that the world told us was necessary. Will you actually let God lead instead of you? Will you accept His sovereignty even if it comes at the hand of changing your perfectly decorated vision board? Will you stop just hearing what God has said and finally test Him in it? I challenge you to simply stay open and available to whatever God is wanting to do in you. He promises that it’ll be far more than you can imagine! (Ephesians 3:20-21)

We’re not stable enough to run our own lives. Let God take the reins, twentysomethings ❤️

Success Through the Storm

Success Through the Storm

by Nikki Rich Writes ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

BE GRATEFUL.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. – Philippians 4:6

“Say thank you” is a phrase we’ve heard since childhood. Though gratitude should be ingrained in our psyche and apart of everything we do, oftentimes, it is the first thing that jumps ship during a trial. The storms of life can often produce stress and strain so intense that we’re too preoccupied with staying afloat to even consider our blessings. No matter the severity of the storm, it has the potential to throw us completely off track, if we allow it to overtake us. How then do we stay strong and keep focused? How do we cope when we’re fed up, stressed out, and worn down? I challenge you to look up long enough to say thank you to the One keeping you above water. Your gut reaction may be to roll your eyes or sigh in frustration. You may question if you’re even above water or rather drowning deeper into despair. Looking up, however, quickly determines your placement. Coming to Him with thanksgiving, even over the many small blessings we take for granted, reinforces the truth that you really aren’t alone. Your gratitude points to God’s hand in your life, especially when it feels like everything is falling apart. God promised that He wouldn’t leave or forsake you.* When you begin to tell Him thank you, you realize that the promise is true. You may be fighting for your life, peace, and purpose, but you definitely aren’t fighting by yourself. Spend some time saying thank You and allow yourself to be comforted by His presence.

STAY FAITHFUL.

Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love Him. – James 1:12

Faithfulness, mastered beautifully by Christ, is often a struggle for many of us. Jesus remained faithful to the will for His life, even in the midst of persecution, rejection, and death. How can we emulate Jesus in this way? The answer is in our tenacity. During the most difficult parts of your storm, it is easy to succumb to the hopelessness of it. You may push away from the persecution and dissatisfaction in hopes of finding peace elsewhere. What if the breakthrough, however, is in planting your feet into the ground and holding on for dear life? God rewards those who hold on. Staying planted, even when difficult, is what builds the determination and focus necessary in preparing you for what God has next. Faithfulness not only prepares, it refines. Character is refined in faithfulness because there is no choice but to cling to God when everything in you wants to run. The clinging produces dependence. Dependence produces expectation. Expectation produces strength. Strength produces greater faith. No longer is it you fighting to stay alive but rather God working, through you, to put the storm under your feet. It all starts with simply sticking with God, no matter what y’all go through together. The reward is coming. Keep those heels dug in.

YOU’RE OKAY.

Then Jesus said to his disciples: “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. For life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest? – Luke 12:22-26

Believing you’re okay, even when life tells you different, has been the hardest truth to grasp, personally. It sounds cute, simplistic, carefree, and even kind. I’ve found, however, that this truth is extremely deep. So deep, in fact, that it can only be accepted as fact once you’ve harnessed the power of gratitude and faithfulness. Life’s storms have a way of making you feel like it’s the end of the world. No matter how many trials God has brought you through, each new one still feels like a major crisis (at least for me!). You feel like you can’t do this anymore. You want to quit. You want to cry. You’re tired and restless. You’re confused and misunderstood. Everything is in shambles yet God continues to whisper “you’re okay”. How is it even possible to believe Him? Jesus made it plain and simple when He told us not to worry about our life. You’re okay because God calls you valuable. If you are valuable to Him, He promises to meet every need. Your value is shown in your gratitude, reminding you that God has never left your side. Your value is shown in your faithfulness, seeing God’s sustaining power hold you steady even during the heavy winds. If God says everything is fine, trust that simplicity. He’s handling the hard stuff. All you need to do is hold onto His hand and His word. You’re okay.

Be grateful. Stay faithful. You’re okay.

This has been my anchor for months now, as God has held me through many of life’s storms and transitions. I pray that you will take some time to meditate on these words and find your strength to keep fighting. God’s got it. God understands. God is taking care of you. Don’t let your hope go. The storms can’t defeat you.

Keep holding on, twentysomethings!

 

* Deuteronomy 31:6

 

Learning & Refining

Learning & Refining

by Nikki Rich Writes ♥ 2 Comments

Sit. Breathe. Listen.

I ask myself often why I can’t take a seat?! My mind constantly races and I never allow myself to be at ease. I’ll catch myself stumbling over , striding towards or striving for something instead of resting. As you can imagine, this has messed with both my endurance and my emotions. There are moments when, at the height of my stride, I can feel on top of the world, handling responsibilities and feeling like I’m really plugged into God. Conversely, I can feel beat up and out of breath when all of my personal effort seemingly leads me nowhere or puts me in an unwanted position I didn’t foresee previously. I’ve learned, or rather have been reminded, that sometimes I disregard the voice of God in the entire matter. While I may have Godly people and Godly influences around me, God Himself will be on the back burner. That positioning often leads to issues like what I’ve described above. A more real example of this just occurred recently. Hopefully my story will be helpful to some of you.

For the past two or three months, I’ve been watching a church on YouTube that preached primarily to young adults. Grabbing my attention by preaching in fun but very insightful ways, I grew excited. As I know myself to do (I’m still a work in progress, y’all), I became obsessed. I listened to sermons night and day and didn’t think anything was wrong because, of course, it was the Word of God. The more time I spent listening to these sermons, as well as a few more from other pastors I loved, I began to feel heavy. They were all telling me to do so many things. I needed to evangelize more. I needed to write my vision down. I needed to have greater faith. I needed to rest more. I needed to put my faith into action. It was information overload. While all these sermons were all valid and all great in their contexts, that didn’t make them all valid and great for me to hear simultaneously. At the time however, I didn’t understand that.

Fast forward to a week or so ago when the heaviness, particularly to evangelize, weighed on me. The idea of evangelizing freaked me out because I’m quiet and introverted, especially around strangers (all prayers are appreciated, y’all). I was fearful honestly. The various sermons told me about the lives that needed to be saved. They told me how people can’t call on Jesus if they never heard of Him (John 10: 14-15). I felt that responsibility. I felt the compassion. I did actually care. I was so scared though. I had fears such as: “What will they say?”, “Will I even make sense?”,  “Will they reject me?”,  and “Will it matter?”.  Regardless of how “weak” those fears may seem to other people, they felt intensely real and strong to me. As real as they felt, the guilt was even more intense. I knew I didn’t need to be fearful. I knew I wasn’t supposed to shy away. No matter how many people told me to breathe and pray for opportunity, I always felt like there was always opportunity that I was cowardly avoiding. I kept holding this guilt and disappointment in myself, not even realizing the true severity of it, until I got a migraine.

My history of migraines runs deep. It’s too deep to get into now but trust me. Long story short, I’ve had chronic migraines since I was thirteen, filled with hospitalizations and prescription medications. By God’s grace, however, I haven’t had a migraine in about two years! As you can imagine then, when I got one, I instantly freaked out and was confused. I didn’t understand where it came from or what triggered it. Though I didn’t connect the dots right away, the following day, God let me know exactly what caused my migraine. He told me, and I paraphrase, “the devil is setting you up. He wants you to believe that you’re not worthy. He wants you to think that I’m upset with you. He’s trying to get you to believe that I’m disappointed in you. You’re believing him. I’m not mad at you. Let’s try again. Focus on Me.” When I heard that, the light bulb went off and everything clicked. The devil knew the right button to push. I’m very type A (again, prayers please!). I always want to do it right, be perfect, and do the best job. It seems to be heightened when it relates to pleasing God with my life. While that’s all great and wonderful, it’s also dangerous because I’m not a perfect person nor will I ever be. God understands our humanity (Psalm 103: 13-18). He knew we weren’t perfect from the beginning. That’s why He sent Jesus in the first place! He gets it. I am the one that so desperately needs to understand that truth! To accept that we aren’t perfect but that we are in God’s grace, is the biggest first step. To sit under Him, submitted, dependent, and obedient is how we win. He wants to help. He cares for us. (Isaiah 30:18)

So for me, focusing on His voice looks like fasting from listening to the zillions of sermons on YouTube everyday and just reading the Bible. I come to Him with questions or thoughts and I let Him lead me to answers and further understanding about who He is and who He says I am in Him. Am I, today, still fearful? Yes! Do I feel like a disappointment and a bad Christian? No! That’s progress in my book. It will only go up from here. That I definitely believe.

I write all of this to say that the devil is busy and working his hardest to defeat you. He will use any and every trick in the book to break you down and pull you away from Christ. Don’t believe his lies, no matter how true they feel. Even at your lowest, God loves you, wants you and is longing to take care of you. Remove the noise and listen for His voice. There’s always more learning and refining to do in us. When you get confronted with something, don’t shy away out of fear, shame, or disappointment. God loves all of you and will continue to work, correct, and shape you into who He’s called you to be. Let Him do it. God is preparing you for greater.

There’s more for you, twenty somethings ❤️